occasionally, when i'm in a particular mood, i wonder about people from my past and if things worked out differently how it might have played out. not necessarily yearning but just thinking about it.

and as far as i can tell things are better off as they are than if they had gone a completely different way. of course certain events could have been handled differently and they did not have to go exactly as they did. but, for the most part, i think everyone is better off.

i can think of one or two (or three) instances where i probably could have benefited from more time with someone, but i think overall it would have been a net negative. i don't mean that as a piteous statement, just that i can sleep on the conclusion (right or wrong) that they are better off. and i don't mean that i have absolved myself of being a jerk. only that i don't often keep myself up wondering what might have been as things generally went the way they were going to go.



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number 9.. .   .? andy andy andy, get your adverbs here

it's okay