you know those few times when you send an email that has you on the verge of tears because of the gravity of it? because even though you know better, and even though it isn't the point, and even though you are wishing only to not let in a single optimistic thought because of how horrible reality will actually turn out to be, you hear the sound of newly received mail ten minutes later. your heart jumps. your hair falls out. and it is an advert for xbox.

i'd like to laugh at my eyes for tearing up, but i can't.

and words kill.

words. kill.. [but i love them for it.]

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