based on little more than a pbs documentary, and other similar studies, i would like to make friends with a crow or two. they seem awesome and while i would gladly provide them with puzzles and snacks (they had film of one picking up 5 gummy bears, come on), they can go do as they please. however, crows don't live near me. so in lieu of this, i would like not to anger any crows as there is little i want less than two decades of smoldering avian resentment.

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