the last time i had a relationship i wrote about the up times on here and left out a lot of the bad breakup stuff.
this time i thought that i would keep the good stuff personal. i felt it was too important to let it get out into the world because i know what the world does to good things. it chews them up. so i thought i could protect it, her, me, us, this time.
i thought that this part of my life, this part where i have to do everything alone, and where i don't get to share anything with anyone, i thought this part was done. i thought it ended years ago. i thought i was above the masses who are adrift and lost. i felt anchored, secure, and that it did not matter whether or not i could do something on my own, because i was not on my own. if i couldn't do it, then we certainly could.
i still feel that way, and i hope that will mean something.
"was she told when she was young that pain would lead to pleasure?..
did she understand it when they said..
..that a man must break his back to earn his day of leisure?..
will she still believe it when he's dead?
she promises the earth to me and i believe her