and then i thought about mentioning i wanted to get indian food today, something fierce, but i wasn't keen on going alone to somewhere i've never been. mainly because if it's good i'll end up sitting there smiling like an idiot and talking to myself about how great it is, or if it somehow was horrible i'd have no one to mumble jokes with or trade some food with. not to mention i usually get some sort of take-out and, take it out of the restaurant so as to make my alone experience more, well, alone. social alone is worse. but all of this seems a sympathy plea, and that's not what i was shooting for, but only to recount my sucky saturday. or uneventful, at least.
and what i wanted to mention in the first place, was this. [as an aside, i will say i'm not a huge sports fan, honestly. but i'm not averse to them either. i enjoy some. that said..] i saw one of the most beautiful things on television tonight. there was a football [that's american football, you crazy rioting europeans, you..] game being played in foxboro, ma tonight [midway between boston and providence if you care] and it was dark, as night tends to be, and it was pouring snow. snow i've not seen where i live for at least a decade or more, and snow i remember seeing in pennsylvania last winter. big flakes streaming from the sky in such volume they almost suffocate you. removing any sense of direction, tracks you've left, or desire to go inside. the snow is deafening. it silences everything else so it doesn't have to compete, and it makes winter amazing. [which is why winter here is fairly lame..] and then this huge deep bell from some clock would ring every fifteen minutes. i'm so glad i got to see it, and had i not i wouldn't have believed it. it is one of those times the lame line if it seems to good to be true, it probably is applies. it was straight out of a movie. and it seemed like some couple should be finding each other as the bell struck, or someone should be jumping off of a building, or something. i realize i'm romanticizing it, but i don't think too much, considering. i want to move north [that or extremely south] so the snow can remove my sense of hearing and equilibrium. that and the people don't have such horrible accents. have you ever asked yourself, or a friend [in late night searching for something to talk about conversation] what is the worst way to die? i used to think freezing was pretty horrible, but i don't think i'd mind so much anymore. compared to other ways, it seems pleasant even..
"you aren't in sight;
you aren't in sight.." -j.
feel broken down;; feel broken down